I wanted to party, God had other plans
Guest post by: Hayley Solich
I am convinced that there are no mistakes in life. No false starts. No wasted moments, weeks, months, or even years. That the events that bring us to the point of salvation are all part of a process.
I would wish the events that led me to God away in a second, if it weren’t that I actually found Him through them and as Jesus described, once you have found the pearl of great price you are willing to sell everything to keep it.
Imagine a young 17-year-old woman. Full of life, creative and passionate. Fully engaged in every way – captain of the sports team, on the debating team, lead in the musicals and Secretary of the Student Council. The world knew her name but no-one really knew her. All they saw was the girl who was successful, the shining star and to some she was later to learn, she was even their hero.
That young woman was me.
No-one really knew the horror of my life, except for my sister and my cousin who I told in a moment of courage. You see, I was a walking wounded. A #MeToo candidate, sexually assaulted by my father from a young age.
Daily I was contending with an alcoholic, and when drunk, abusive father and an absent working mother. I very clearly remember the hours spent in the car, sitting outside the local RSL club while my mother tried to convince my drunk, gambling father to come home because he was upsetting the female patrons.
I often describe myself as dragged up and not brought up, because despite my mother’s best efforts she was just absent. She was a wonderful role model – community focused, diligent, principled. Yet she yoked herself to a broken man – and as they say, broken people break people.
The truth is that I was a good kid. I was too busy working, studying and doing all of my hobbies (Dancing, Drama, Music), to get into too much mischief. I didn’t drink – I’d seen too much with my dad. I didn’t smoke – it just didn’t appeal to me. So, my friends would be sitting in a circle and the joint would be passed by me. I was never offered, for which I am grateful. I was just social and I think my Dad had his own idea about who I was and what I did but it was a wrong idea.
So, when I was out one night with friends and a random stranger assault me, it was a very rude shock. Punched in the face several times, I was literally in shock. Consequently, I didn’t get home until about 3am. Arriving home, I pulled up at the back of my house, only to be met at the door by a very unhappy father who immediately told me to get my stuff and get out.
Gutted, I went into my room without saying a word and gathered what I could. Crying, I put it in the car and then drove off, not really knowing where to go or what to do. All I know about that night was the total anguish of abandonment. First by mother, who had left three months previous and then by my father. So, I ended up going to a girlfriend’s house and stayed there for the night.
If ever I needed my Dad it was in that hour but I realised then that I was truly alone in the world. This happened 3 months before my final exams at school, so you couldn’t get worse timing.
The next six months passed in a blur of disappointment as I lived at my Aunt’s house and tried to forget what happened. I didn’t achieve the grades I needed, didn’t get into the Uni I wanted to attend. So, abandoning all of my plans, I decided to move to the city and party it up.
And this is where my journey took a swing in the right direction. My plan moving to the city was to party. However, my cousin had become a born again Christian and consequently, I walked into this wall of love that was truly indescribable. The broken part of me was like a thirsty sponge, just soaking it all up. Within a week, I was begging my cousin to let me accept Jesus into my life. And that is when I met the Father of my dreams – Father God. His unconditional love completely saturated my soul and filled me with a peace I had never known before.
Our brokenness is no match for his merciful, unconditional love. He chose me before the foundations of the world and He called me to be His. I just needed the opportunity to know it.
I’d like to say that since that day everything has been smooth sailing but it certainly hasn’t. In fact, I’ve written my book, Fat Girls Can Dance, which I will release someday soon because people kept telling me you should write a book about all the things you have had to overcome. It reads like a Hollywood blockbuster - and it is all true!
But the underlying factor that keeps my head held high, hope in my heart and a smile on my face is that I have a father and His name is God. And simply put – He is amazing! And He will never let me down like my earthly father did. He has walked with me faithfully over the past 35 years. He has never let me down and never will. I am glad that I said yes and surrendered. I gained so much more in the process!
About the author
Hayley Solich is an Author, Community Leader and Worship Pastor at Heart Called Ministries, where she is helping to re-wire, re-fire and re-inspire people to love and serve God. Her passion is creative, transformation of people's lives by the power of God through teaching, prayer and worship. She carries a fire of God anointing.
Website: Heart Called Ministries
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